I remember my first day of class in Earth science in the ninth grade.
My teacher, Mr. Harman, wrote the word “assume” on the board…and proceeded with the old lesson of why not to assume…if you don’t know it…ask someone.
The point is…by assuming something you stand to make a fool of yourself.
I have, in my short life as a stay at home mother,
had many people assume some things about me.
Let me just clear some things up for those people out there who may
not know these things about a stay at home mom.
And I only bring them up here because they come up in my life from time to time…leading me to believe there is a large portion of the population that actually believe these assumptions.
1) My job as a stay at home mom will not be done when my kids are both in school…so please don’t assume that it will be. I have no intention of ever getting a “real” job again.
2) Do not assume that I am a stay at home mom due to any of the following:
being lazy, being uneducated, being weak willed (ie. my husband makes me), not wanting to get a “real” job, being overprotective, being controlling or that I have no other choice.
3) Please don’t assume that I am dying for the day that I can get back into the work world and get a “real” job. I am doing my “real” job.
I told my husband on our first date that I had no intention of being a career woman, and that my calling in life was to be a wife and mom.
Amazingly he took me on a second date. 🙂
4) Please do not assume that my college education is “going to waste” because I don’t have a “real” job. My job is “real” and I use my education on a daily basis.
Imagine that.
5) Please do not assume that because I am a stay at home mom, that my schedule is any more open than yours. No, I cannot run your errands, pick up your kids, watch your kids, etc, because I don’t have a “real” job and therefore must be overflowing with free time that I am desperate for you to fill.
6) Please don’t assume that part of my reasoning for being a stay at home mom is because I believe that no one else can raise my children as well as I can.
Actually…this one is true.
7) Do not assume that I watch Oprah.
8) Do not assume that your job is more important than mine just because you get a paycheck.
My treasure is in Heaven.
9) Do not assume that I am “so lucky” that I get to stay home.
Luck has nothing to do with it.
We make sacrifices every day to make sure that I am able
to stay home with my kids. We had to work at it.
It is possible for anyone, I believe. When I first became
a stay at home mom my husband was making about $18,000 a year but because we cut out the wants and stuck to the needs (tithe, bills, food and diapers), we made it. Me staying home was a priority so we cut what we needed to to make sure that happened.
And there was never any kind of government assistance.
We made it work because it is important to us.
It took a lot of faith in God and prayer.
10) And lastly, don’t assume that I want your pity because I “have to” stay at home with my kids. It is my choice and I LOVE it. I love it. I love it. I feel as though I am fulfilling God’s greatest purpose for a woman…being a mom and caring for my family.
Any other assumptions you would care to share?
🙂