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being shown your own ugly.

 This is a weird post.  

Brought together by months worth of this and that…sealed up by a recent event or two.  Are you lost yet?  Hang with me…I will get to a point.  

I’m not sure how to get to the cusp of what I want to say…so bear with me if I ramble.  In my history with Etsy I have had more than an item or two copied.  It has always bugged me.  For some reason 

Because of selfishness I have been possessive of my ideas.  Being a dumb, sinful human being I convinced myself that MY ideas were MY ideas.  And no one else was to have them.  Period.  They were mine. Mine. MINE.  I have sent more than one email to said copiers asking them to knock it off.  Always, as polite as I know how but still.  I thought *I* did the work to come up with that idea and only *I* should get to use it.  Dumb.  Dumb dumb dumbdumb. 

I have always tried to tread carefully near others ideas as well.  If I thought I was coming too close to *their* idea I would write them and run *my* idea about changing *their* idea by them before I ever dared to sell it or share it.  I have been shot down more than once with a (in a nutshell) “That’s my idea, no.”  

Bummer cause really it was an original idea that happened to be born off of another idea. 

Isn’t that were all ideas come from?  

  I think there are some ideas that are just up for grabs for making your own…pillowcase dresses, fabric flowers, pillows with names on it, headbands, monograms, purses, bags, photo magnets, towels, houses, gardens, wearing clothes…basically if there are enough of them out there…make it your own.  Other wise we would all be driving around in Model T’s, right?  Toyota didn’t invent the car…just took an idea and figured it out for themselves.  Do we go around saying “Hey, planting a garden-wearing shoes-jumping rope-going to the store was MY idea!!!!”?  No, cause that is dumb.  Follow me? 

Some ideas are like that.  Some aren’t.  Claiming that a photo someone else took is yours? No.  Copying and pasting someones words or design work? No.  

Taking ANYTHING and making it exactly as someone else has done.  No. 

I have never, ever used someones idea and called it my own.  Anything that I have claimed to make myself, using my own measurements and know how…is a true claim.  You can bet your life on it.  

But recently I was accused of that. 

This person was not ugly.  But I was shown my own ugly through them.  I saw that even though they were polite and nice…it held a mirror up to me.  And I didn’t like it.   Though we cleared things up…it got me thinking.

What would Jesus do about someone using *His* ideas? 

Um wait…aren’t they all *His* ideas?

Would I be proud to tell Him (if He didn’t already know) that I had written an email asking someone to stop using *my* ideas?  No way.  I’m kind of embarrassed to admit that I did that now.  How dumb.  How foolish of me.  I don’t want to be known for being greedy or unkind or selfish.  Because I am NOT those things.  So why should I be that way with my ideas?  Isn’t every good gift from above?

And I have done it.  I have staked a claim in something that was not *mine* to claim.  

Even if I have formed a design from sketch to product.  It is not MY idea.  I have no right to be possessive of it.   ESPECIALLY if I put it on here for you to see…or in my shop.  Especially if I have never bothered to get an idea copyrighted…which if my idea was SO awesome I should have done…right? 

Duh.  I can SO CLEARLY see that what fuels that “minemineminemine” complex is my own stupid insecurity.  That someone could possibly take my idea and do it better than me.  Or that others will not know that it was MY idea in the first place.  Or that my idea will lead someone to thinking of something better than I thought of…and that somehow that makes me lesser.

Earlier this week my husband said “If you’re not part of the solution…you’re part of the problem”…we were talking about something totally unrelated but it clicked for me here.  

I need to purpose in knowing that my own skill and touch will stand out…and if someone takes an idea that I had…and uses it for their own…then THEIR own skill and touch will stand out.  

It’s like I am trying to hold on to all this *stuff* and while I am busy holding on…I can’t take hold of anything new…I’m so busy protecting what is *mine* that I can’t move forward.

I don’t know what this means for anyone else.  But for me…I’m going to stop trying to hold on to things that don’t belong to me.  Consider yourself getting my blessing to go forth and use whatever ideas I have ever shared here or will share…I hope they do you well…and that you do well for others because of them.  God gave me every bit of talent I have…along with every idea and notion.  Who am I not to share it with others freely?

I’m not saying that I would write a book and let you publish under your name.  But I will, from this point on assume the best of people.  Assume that that they just like to create and make and sew.  And that mimicry really is flattering.   

I want to practice what I preach to my boys in this area…

extend grace and be kind and loving to others.   

BE the change.

And I want to live in a world where people extend grace, are kind and loving to each other.  And assume the best.  Always.  That’s a solution I can get behind.    

Me being greedy isn’t part of that. 

You follow?

(please note this is about ME.  not meant to apply to YOU…unless you want it to…then feel free but this is just my rambling about ME and changes I want to make in ME…but I welcome your (kind) feedback)